How To Get Rid Of Your Enemies
There was a person I hated more than anyone else. This person hurt me, and they did it on purpose.
For years, I hated them. Whenever their name came up, it would rekindle the fire of hostility I had in my heart. I did this for years. I suffered, and the worst part is that they didn't even know how much it affected me.
Years went by, and the Hate metastasized from my heart to my mind. Eventually, I could feel it in my body. It was slowly eating at me like a parasite. Ultimately, It began to show up in other relationships. Worst, It was showing up in how I related to myself.
Then, I learned how to get rid of my enemies.
There's this thing Jesus said that was revolutionary in his day.
In First Century Jerusalem, the common thinking was to love your neighbor and hate your enemy. Jesus had a different perspective.
"You've been taught to love your neighbor and hate your enemy, but I tell you, love your enemy. Do good to those who curse you.”
You might wonder, how does this help to get rid of them?
Thich Nhat Hanh said it best in the book Living Buddha, Living Christ:
When Gandhi said that love is the force that can liberate, he meant we have to love our enemy. Even if our enemy is cruel, even if he is crushing us, sowing terror and injustice, we have to love him. This is the message of Jesus. But how can we love our enemy? There is only one way – to understand him. We have to understand why he is that way, how he has come to be like that, why he does not see things the way we do. Understanding a person brings us the power to love and accept him. And the moment we love and accept him, he ceases to be our enemy. To "love our enemy" is impossible, because the moment we love him, he is no longer our enemy.
The moment we love our enemy, they cease to be our enemy. Let that marinate for a moment.
The thing that makes this idea from Jesus, Gandhi & Thich Nhat Hahn so revolutionary is the freedom it brings.
How much space would open in your heart and mind if you had no enemies and hated no one?
What if we sought to understand "those people" who have a different political perspective.
What if we gave up all hope for a different past and started focusing on being healthy today.
What if we stopped medicating with alcohol, Netflix, and mindless social media scrolling?
What if we started doing the hard work of forgiving and healing.
When we hate, we give ourselves over to the very thing that hurt us in the first place. This is the same energy that caused the other person to hurt us. Hate creates more hate.
Maybe, that's why Martin Luther King Jr said,
Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.
There's a Chinese Proverb that says;
It's better to light a candle than to scream at the darkness.
Today, take a moment to search yourself and identify any hate or animosity in your heart.
Notice it, Feel it, and let it go.